EASTER FLASHBACK

Arden got a huge Easter basket from her grandparents about a week before Easter, filled to the brim with chocolate eggs. I turned to my wife and said "Who the hell sends this much candy to a 3-year-old?" Of course I looked like an ass when I remembered the Easter basket we made for her was comprised completely of candy. Candy I had helped pick out. Anyway, we filled up several candy dishes around the house with the goods because Arden didn't like the fake straw in the baskets because it reminded her too much of hair and Arden has an irrational fear of hair and dust bunnies. After a few days of ignoring the candy - okay, I didn't exactly ignore it, I may have eaten a few pieces...every couple of hours...lactose intolerance and all. Eventually Jen turned to me and said that she didn't like that Arden had access to all the candy and I said, "Arden's not the type of kid who would just take candy without asking." Boy was I wrong. The very next morning I'm in the kitchen doing dishes with the baby while Arden was apparently watching Curious George in the other room. When I finished I walked by the living room and saw that George was over and the news was on. And she hadn't complained. That should've been my first sign that something was up. Then I realized Arden wasn't in the living room. I called out, "Arden, where are you?" A muffled response from behind the Laz-E-Boy yelled, "Go away!" I still didn't think much of it because she had been a bit moody lately and she also sometimes plays Legos back there so I told her I was gonna jump in the shower. As soon as I turned on the water it finally hit me that something was wrong, very wrong. So I went back into the living room and said, "Arden, what are you doing back there?" "Nothing, go away!" Of course if she really wanted me to go away she should've said, "Come check this out." Anyway, I walked over to the Laz-E-Boy and saw that she was hunched over a massive pile chocolate egg wrappers. I said, "What the heck are you doing?" She instantly burst into tears and said, "I love you, Daddy!" Her face and hands were covered in chocolate and she had bits of tinfoil in her teeth from trying to gnaw off the wrappers. It was so ridiculous and she was so cute I couldn't get mad. But the best part was she walked on eggshells around me for the rest of the day, waiting for the hammer to come down. But I'm a big softy and I just made her promise to never do something like that again. And of course she wasn't allowed to have any more of the candy. But I assure you, it didn't go to waste. :)