Today Arden and Alex take on Lady Gaga...
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
MUSICAL BEDS
Alex is on what must be her 5th cold since the New Year began so...
Last night I "slept" in my bed then moved to Alex's bed (when she invaded mine), then Jen couldn't take the invader so she took Alex's bed while I returned to our bed with Alex, but Alex kept coughing so I set her up on the recliner while I took the couch, but then she wanted her bed again so Jen went back to our bed and I (unintentionally) fell asleep on Alex's floor until Alex announced that she was awake at 3:30 AM so I took the recliner while she watched TV on the couch until she decided she wanted to sit with daddy on the recliner until dawn. Sometime after that I officially became a zombie. So aim for the head.
Last night I "slept" in my bed then moved to Alex's bed (when she invaded mine), then Jen couldn't take the invader so she took Alex's bed while I returned to our bed with Alex, but Alex kept coughing so I set her up on the recliner while I took the couch, but then she wanted her bed again so Jen went back to our bed and I (unintentionally) fell asleep on Alex's floor until Alex announced that she was awake at 3:30 AM so I took the recliner while she watched TV on the couch until she decided she wanted to sit with daddy on the recliner until dawn. Sometime after that I officially became a zombie. So aim for the head.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
QUOTABLE ARDEN
 |
While driving in the car yesterday Arden tells me she knows our phone number and then proceeds to rattle it off. I told her that was great. And that it's important to know your phone number, "That way you can always get in touch with me." Arden then asks, "When I grow up will I get my own phone number?" I said, "Yes." Arden then says, "Will I get to choose the number?" I said, "Sometimes." Arden nods her head to herself for a moment and then says, "I would like my phone number to be one." I look back at her and say, "You want your phone number to be the number one?" Arden says, "Yeah, that way when I'm famous it will be easy for people to get in touch with me."
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
BEST DAY EVER!
Just like the day Arden started school there, three years before, I felt like I needed a stiff drink when I walked out the door. Alex was totally fine; she had a boatload of new toys to play with and just as many new opportunities to stain her clothes. She waved “goodbye” to me no problem; it was me that was a wreck. With Arden I was nervous leaving her there, letting someone else be in control of her daily destiny. I was also on edge because Arden had to go up and down a flight of stairs to get to her classroom and she didn’t know how to climb stairs yet. This time I didn’t have any of those worries. Well, the stair thing still bothered me a bit, but what really got to me was that this was the end of an era. The last child I’m ever going to have, assuming we have no accidents between now and when I get the boys snipped next summer, is no longer a baby. She’s officially a preschooler now and she’s going to learn very quickly how to be independent and no longer need her daddy the way she did before. The magic of seeing her discover the world around her will soon fade.
But today was also a great day. Arden is still on winter break thanks to the Los Angeles Unified School District’s three freakin’ week holiday schedule and with Alex being in school it was a rare occasion for me to hang out with just Arden, so I decided to do something special with her. I decided to take her to the American Girl Store Café and have a special father-daughter lunch with her.
I’ve always been against the whole American Girl thing (the commercialism, the racial stereotypes with their “historic” dolls), but man do they know how to make a little girl and her dad feel special inside that café. First off you need reservations and with those reservations you need to check in fifteen minutes early, probably so there’s some guaranteed shopping time while you wait. And of course we shopped. But the procedure helps make the meal feel like an event. That and having your daughter dress in a matching outfit with her doll. Once it’s time to be seated, you and your doll(s) (there was a kid there with five dolls) are escorted to your table where your doll is placed in their very own tableside booster. Then you’re served warm sticky buns, followed by fruit skewers and crudité with ranch and honey mustard dipping sauces. Then comes the main course. Arden had “butterfly pasta” (bowtie pasta) and I had the turkey dinner and I gotta say, it was damn good. I washed it down with a peach bellini and Arden a Shirley Temple. Dessert consisted of chocolate mousse in a flowerpot, a frosted sugar cookie and a heart-shaped piece of cake. We were both given all three of those. And to keep you and your daughter entertained you’re given a little box of questions to ask between courses. Things like, “Would you rather be able to fly or turn invisible? And why?” Arden chose invisible so she could spy on her boyfriend and kiss him when he isn’t looking. For the record Arden doesn’t have a boyfriend, at least not a requited one. She's obsessed with a little boy named Goetz who refuses to kiss her. Anyway, it was a wonderful experience, but what was really great was hearing for the rest of the day, “This is the best day ever.”
After lunch we tried to shake off our sugar comas and went to pick up Alex at school. We arrived just as naptime was getting over. As we were walking down the hall we overheard Alex’s teacher (who just happened to be Arden’s first teacher) pretending to call me, in order to calm Alex down. We were told she was great all day, but when she woke up from her nap fifteen minutes prior she was a little confused and started crying for me. I know it sounds cruel, but I couldn’t help but smile to myself because my baby still needed me. At least for today. So between sending Alex to school today and spending time with Arden, it was kinda the best day ever for me too.
Photos: Top, Arden and Alex posing before Alex's first day of school; Bottom, Arden at the American Girl Store Café .
Friday, December 31, 2010
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Anyway, I apologize for the long delay between posts. It’s been a crazy six months that included a trip to Maine during one of their hottest summers on record and another trip to Hawaii with my parents and sister that ended in mass amounts of vomit. Arden also went to three different summer camps, one of which was a French immersion program that left Arden hating the French more than Middle America. We also did a complete remodel of our kitchen and bathroom...and lived in the house during the construction...while I recovered from a tonsillectomy...and Jen was away on business travelling all over the country.
Despite all my misadventures it was also an extremely busy year for my non-blog related writing. Of course right when it started to get really busy our part-time nanny decided to head home for the summer which left me back to watching two kids all day and writing all night while scouring care.com for a new nanny in whatever spare time I could find.
With Alex starting preschool next week (WTF?) and Arden taping a guest spot for a reboot of Kids Say The Darndest Things this coming Wednesday (I know, it’s about time), it’s definitely a new year. And while I’m hoping to continue to be busy with other writing, I’m making it my New Year’s Resolution to keep on blogging. And hopefully expand on some of the above misadventures. In the meantime I leave you with our holiday card and I wish you all a Happy and Healthy New Year.
Photo by: Greg Young
QUOTABLE ARDEN
This afternoon in the car Arden says to me, "Are you proud of me when I eat all of my dinner, Daddy?" "Of course," I said. Arden replied, "Why would you be proud of me if eating dinner was something I'm just supposed to do?"
Saturday, July 24, 2010
WHEN IS YOUR CHILD READY FOR A SLEEPOVER?
Sorry for the delay between posts. I've been working on two non-blog-related projects and went on vacation and life in general got in the way. Anyway, I wrote a new piece for Parents Ask last week, but their site is in the process of a makeover and it may be a while before it actually shows up so I figured I'd just post it here now and Parents Ask can have my sloppy seconds. So without further adieu...
The title of this piece is really a rhetorical question. I have the answer and it’s “not 5 years old.” At least not an unsolicited sleepover. I mean if your friends are really in a bind for a babysitter and ask you to watch their kid overnight, that’s another story, but when your 5 year old asks on their on volition if their friend can sleepover, just say, “No.” But in either scenario the end result probably would’ve ended up the same for us this past weekend: a disaster of epic proportions.
About 20 months ago Arden had her first sleepover and she didn’t even know it. Jen went into labor in the middle of the night so I called up our closest couple-friends-with-kids, Craig and Erin and had Craig come over and sleep at the house while we went off to have another baby. Arden woke up that morning to find Uncle Craig there, waiting to give her breakfast and a ride to preschool. That night Arden slept at Craig and Erin’s house and got to have her first “official” sleepover with her “best friend and worst enemy” Franny. According to Craig and Erin, Arden was a complete angel (who somehow ended up sleeping with Craig and Erin). I find it hard to believe the “angel” part, but Craig and Erin are too nice to say otherwise. So for the past 20 months the girls have been impatiently waiting for a sleepover reunion…at our house.
We’ve managed to come up with 20 months of excuses for it not to happen, “Franny’s got church in the morning…You’re catching a cold and you don’t want to spread it…Franny needs it to be pitch black in order to sleep.” (Yes, we’re simultaneously staving off a sleepover and creating a neurotic child.) Anyway, I finally gave in on Saturday. We were having Craig and Erin and the kids over for pizza and beer that night so I said, “Why doesn’t Franny sleep over?”
As I just mentioned, Franny and Arden are each other’s best friend and worst enemy. They love each other, get excited to see each other, but when they finally meet, they fight like cats and dogs. So essentially they’re like sisters. In fact they’re only a week apart (we actually planned to get pregnant at the same time as Craig and Erin and it worked out). But the two girls have completely different personalities. Arden’s on the bossy side. Okay, she IS the bossy side. And Franny is, let’s just say, sensitive. If Arden wants to play “kitchen” and Franny doesn’t Arden will scrunch her face and bitch to us that Franny isn’t being nice and upon hearing this Franny will flop to the floor with overdramatic fake tears until someone resolves the issue. Now if Franny wants to, say watch iCarly, and Arden doesn’t, Franny will just stand there like a rock while Arden gets all up in her grill, reading her her Playskool Miranda Rights. This may lead to a little shoving which can sometimes lead to flops to the ground and overdramatic teardom.
During Pizza Time, things were no different. We had to settle at least a dozen disputes, often with the threat of cancelling the sleepover, but unbelievably, no matter how pissed each girl was at the other, they both pleaded with us to not call off the sleepover. We theorized that once Craig and Erin left the girls would calm down because there was no one to run and tattle to. But we were wrong. We set the girls up on the pull out couch in my office downstairs. We put on a movie and gave them some popcorn, but they fought over the snacks, the bedcovers, who kicked who under the sheets, who had more stuffed animals, etc. And when they weren’t bickering they were coming up with new excuses not to go to sleep. Arden: “I need my night light.” Franny, “I need a night light too.” Me, “I need a gun.”
We eventually got the girls down around 11:00 PM after 16 trips to the bathroom and Jen pretending to sleep in between them. By that point it was too late to watch the movie we rented so we just took some Advil and went to bed…until 6:00 AM.
I figured with the girls up so late that they would sleep in. Nope. The whole house was up at 6:00 AM. Including my “Sunday is the only day I get to sleep late” wife. When I offered the girls each a box of those individually packed Kellogg’s cereals there was immediate competition, “I want Frosted Flakes.” “I want Frosted Flakes too.” Me: “There’s only one box.” “Okay, I’ll have Fruit Loops.” “I want Fruit Loops too.” So Jen and I said, “Screw it, we’re going out for pancakes.” We thought the change of venue would loosen things up and kill some time before dropping off Franny. But the antics continued at the restaurant when Franny had the audacity to use the red crayon that Arden had just finished using. So Arden throws a fit and says, “Franny took my crayon” and Franny says, “No I didn’t” and Arden says Franny isn’t being nice so Franny drops to the restaurant floor and starts crying. Jen had had it at that point and said, “Arden, stop being mean. Franny stop being so overdramatic” and broke the crayon in two and gave them each half. Both girls looked at their red crayons, then each other and nodded. We had finally reached a peace accord. From that point on everything was hunky dory. The girls colored quietly, ate their pancakes, drank their orange juices. And then it was time to pay. And both girls wanted to bring the check up to the counter. I’d like to say they decided to go up together and pay the bill as a team. But then I’d be lying. Let’s just say there won’t be any sleepovers at our house any time soon.
WHEN IS YOUR CHILD READY FOR A SLEEPOVER?
The title of this piece is really a rhetorical question. I have the answer and it’s “not 5 years old.” At least not an unsolicited sleepover. I mean if your friends are really in a bind for a babysitter and ask you to watch their kid overnight, that’s another story, but when your 5 year old asks on their on volition if their friend can sleepover, just say, “No.” But in either scenario the end result probably would’ve ended up the same for us this past weekend: a disaster of epic proportions.
About 20 months ago Arden had her first sleepover and she didn’t even know it. Jen went into labor in the middle of the night so I called up our closest couple-friends-with-kids, Craig and Erin and had Craig come over and sleep at the house while we went off to have another baby. Arden woke up that morning to find Uncle Craig there, waiting to give her breakfast and a ride to preschool. That night Arden slept at Craig and Erin’s house and got to have her first “official” sleepover with her “best friend and worst enemy” Franny. According to Craig and Erin, Arden was a complete angel (who somehow ended up sleeping with Craig and Erin). I find it hard to believe the “angel” part, but Craig and Erin are too nice to say otherwise. So for the past 20 months the girls have been impatiently waiting for a sleepover reunion…at our house.
We’ve managed to come up with 20 months of excuses for it not to happen, “Franny’s got church in the morning…You’re catching a cold and you don’t want to spread it…Franny needs it to be pitch black in order to sleep.” (Yes, we’re simultaneously staving off a sleepover and creating a neurotic child.) Anyway, I finally gave in on Saturday. We were having Craig and Erin and the kids over for pizza and beer that night so I said, “Why doesn’t Franny sleep over?”
As I just mentioned, Franny and Arden are each other’s best friend and worst enemy. They love each other, get excited to see each other, but when they finally meet, they fight like cats and dogs. So essentially they’re like sisters. In fact they’re only a week apart (we actually planned to get pregnant at the same time as Craig and Erin and it worked out). But the two girls have completely different personalities. Arden’s on the bossy side. Okay, she IS the bossy side. And Franny is, let’s just say, sensitive. If Arden wants to play “kitchen” and Franny doesn’t Arden will scrunch her face and bitch to us that Franny isn’t being nice and upon hearing this Franny will flop to the floor with overdramatic fake tears until someone resolves the issue. Now if Franny wants to, say watch iCarly, and Arden doesn’t, Franny will just stand there like a rock while Arden gets all up in her grill, reading her her Playskool Miranda Rights. This may lead to a little shoving which can sometimes lead to flops to the ground and overdramatic teardom.
During Pizza Time, things were no different. We had to settle at least a dozen disputes, often with the threat of cancelling the sleepover, but unbelievably, no matter how pissed each girl was at the other, they both pleaded with us to not call off the sleepover. We theorized that once Craig and Erin left the girls would calm down because there was no one to run and tattle to. But we were wrong. We set the girls up on the pull out couch in my office downstairs. We put on a movie and gave them some popcorn, but they fought over the snacks, the bedcovers, who kicked who under the sheets, who had more stuffed animals, etc. And when they weren’t bickering they were coming up with new excuses not to go to sleep. Arden: “I need my night light.” Franny, “I need a night light too.” Me, “I need a gun.”
We eventually got the girls down around 11:00 PM after 16 trips to the bathroom and Jen pretending to sleep in between them. By that point it was too late to watch the movie we rented so we just took some Advil and went to bed…until 6:00 AM.
I figured with the girls up so late that they would sleep in. Nope. The whole house was up at 6:00 AM. Including my “Sunday is the only day I get to sleep late” wife. When I offered the girls each a box of those individually packed Kellogg’s cereals there was immediate competition, “I want Frosted Flakes.” “I want Frosted Flakes too.” Me: “There’s only one box.” “Okay, I’ll have Fruit Loops.” “I want Fruit Loops too.” So Jen and I said, “Screw it, we’re going out for pancakes.” We thought the change of venue would loosen things up and kill some time before dropping off Franny. But the antics continued at the restaurant when Franny had the audacity to use the red crayon that Arden had just finished using. So Arden throws a fit and says, “Franny took my crayon” and Franny says, “No I didn’t” and Arden says Franny isn’t being nice so Franny drops to the restaurant floor and starts crying. Jen had had it at that point and said, “Arden, stop being mean. Franny stop being so overdramatic” and broke the crayon in two and gave them each half. Both girls looked at their red crayons, then each other and nodded. We had finally reached a peace accord. From that point on everything was hunky dory. The girls colored quietly, ate their pancakes, drank their orange juices. And then it was time to pay. And both girls wanted to bring the check up to the counter. I’d like to say they decided to go up together and pay the bill as a team. But then I’d be lying. Let’s just say there won’t be any sleepovers at our house any time soon.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)